If you weren’t able to attend Alive Hospice’s conference for faith leaders earlier this month, you can still benefit from what the presenters had to say! We’ve made available the text from all four presentations as a free and helpful resource. Alive Hospice Blogger and Chaplain Nanette Mathe was one of the presenters, along with Chaplain Allen Withers, Chaplain Mark Russell and Chaplain Phyllis Sublett.

Don’t miss these powerful presentations!

Nanette Mathe

People often ask if I sing to or with my patients. Sometimes I do, especially if the patient is non-verbal. I believe that music is a way of spiritually connecting with others.

One day I entered the room of a woman who was getting close to the end of her life. She looked at me with frightened eyes when I entered, so I sat way across the room so she wouldn’t be afraid. Soon, she forgot I was there and started humming.

I spoke to her quietly telling her who I was. She stopped singing and looked at me. I told her that she had a beautiful singing voice and sang “Jesus Loves Me” to her. She smiled and began to hum loudly, smiling all the while. It sounded like “Silent Night” so I started to sing it. She responded with more smiling and eye contact. When I finished she hummed “O Come, All Ye Faithful” and beamed at me when she was finished. I praised her singing and clapped.

She laughed.

I came closer and asked if I could pray with her. She smiled, so I prayed. I held her hand and watched her retreat back into the dementia. We touched each other, just for a short time, with our music. What a gift!

Today, Alive Hospice welcomed community faith leaders for a conference on spiritual care at the end of life. Four Alive Hospice chaplains spoke on a variety of topics, and there was plenty of time for the exchange of ideas between participants and the presenters.

It can be hard to know what to say or do when visiting a dying person and/or family members, and it can be hard to know how to take care of oneself in the process of providing spiritual support. The goals of the conference were to provide insights on these topics and to offer tools to help turn a difficult visit into a very meaningful experience.

Working together and staying connected, hospice chaplains and community faith leaders can do a great deal to comfort and support the people in their care.

@AliveHospice live-tweeted during the conference. You can check out what the presenters had to say at http://www.twitter.com/alivehospice or by searching for the hashtag #faithleaders.

Thank you to the all of the faith leaders who attended today’s conference! Each person who was present enhanced the experience for all involved.

Nanette Mathe

One of the first questions I ask a patient after he or she has been admitted to our care is, “Do you attend worship services?” If so, I ask where and who his or her leader is and if their faith community is helping them at this time. They may be bringing food, visiting, or praying for the family.

If the patient has a faith community, I explain that my support is secondary to their faith community support. The patient usually has a good and longstanding relationship with his or her community and looks to the leader for guidance.

The faith leader plays an important role in the life of the patient and family members by providing support through visiting, prayer, scripture and the assurance that the patient and family will be cared for. The faith leader may also provide forgiveness, absolution, reassurance about life after death, and may be called upon to provide guidance with end of life decisions.

On a related topic, Alive Hospice is offering a faith leaders’ conference on August 6 that will explain hospice and help faith leaders understand the care the patient is receiving and the important role he or she plays in supporting the patient and family. It’s free!

Alive Hospice’s interfaith chaplains will offer insights and tools that can help turn a difficult visit with a dying patient into a very meaningful experience for all involved.  I am honored to be one of the presenters and will be talking about a patient/friend of mine, the care she received from hospice and the lessons I learned about living from her.

Please join us! To register, call 963-4831 or send an e-mail to kking@alivehospice.org by July 6.

Earlier this week, the Wilson Post newspaper published the beautiful story of an Alive Hospice patient’s voyage through the last few months of his life — and an unforgettable day on the lake, thanks to his Alive Hospice chaplain and some friends. This story shows just how much living is left to be done, even (or especially?) in hospice care.

Click here to read the story. It’s one you won’t soon forget.

Additionally, the Daily News Journal recently spotlighted Alive Hospice’s upcoming Camp Forget-Me-Not, a summer day camp for grieving kids ages 6-14. Click here to read how it helped one family (and how it can help others).

Janny Adkins

Historically there has been a strong connection between hospice care and churches. In other parts of our country, churches originally were the driving impetus to initiate hospice care. The mission of most hospices and faith groups find shared mandates and common ground. Both desire to minister to the needs of people who are in need of compassionate loving care, throughout life and especially during death and a life-threatening illness.

For this reason alone, many faith communities support hospice care through providing volunteers, financial support, and utilizing hospice programs to educate their members. Popular topics for educational programs for faith groups focus on coping with grief, end-of-life care, death and dying, and using hospice care.

Hospice care includes meeting the spiritual needs of the patient and family. Many people confuse spiritual needs with religious needs. They are similar but not synonyms. Most religions have prescribed doctrine for meeting spiritual needs. However, all people, regardless of religious beliefs, are spiritual and have common spiritual needs; how they meet those needs may vary from person to person.

Basic spiritual needs include:

• The need to give and receive love
• The need to give and receive forgiveness
• The need to find meaning and purpose in life
• The need to have a sense of connection to others, self, to nature, and to something bigger than the self.

If you or your church are interested in more information regarding Alive Hospice, or would like a speaker on topics related to hospice care, please call me at 615-332-4003 or e-mail me.
 
Janny Adkins is an Alive Hospice account executive who informs health care professionals, patients, and families about hospice care.

Nanette Mathe

Sometimes the patient I visit is not awake or alert. Sometimes he or she is sleeping, or has dementia, or is simply far enough along in the dying process so that he or she will not respond to anyone’s presence. Sometimes I am alone with the patient. People often ask what I do for the patient and how I “minister” to him or her.

First of all, I do my homework. I check to find out if the patient has a religious background. I talk to family and caregivers to find out what was important to this person: Perhaps the patient liked music. Is he or she open to prayer? Did the person quote favorite scriptures?

With this information in hand, I sing, quote scripture, or pray with the patient. I believe that there is a spiritual connection between us that is there even though the patient does not respond. However, sometimes the patient smiles, relaxes, or turns his or her head toward me while I am talking. Sometimes not.

My prayer is that God will touch this person with the peace that passes all understanding through song, prayer, or scripture.

Nanette Mathe is an Alive Hospice chaplain who serves on the agency’s Murfreesboro team.

Nanette Mathe

I recently conducted a survey among my patients asking them what they are most thankful for. The number one answer was “loved ones”. They are thankful for the loved ones who are taking care of them, the loved ones from the past who helped shape their lives, and loved ones whose lives they have helped shape. It was nearly unanimous!

The second thing they are most thankful for was an experience of some kind. For example, some said they got to see the art of a favorite artist, or hear a concert of a favorite composer or musician. Others talked about having the opportunity to travel to see something magnificent like the Grand Canyon, or Paris, or the animals in Africa.

For those who believe in God, they are thankful for the years they have had while wishing for just a little more time. But still, they are thankful.

Funny, they weren’t thankful for the extra hours they put in at their jobs, or, for that matter, for money earned, money spent, or even money given away. Hmmmm… what does that teach us?

With this wonderful Thanksgiving holiday upon us, what are you thankful for? What is out there that you have a passion for and would like to experience? Do it soon so you, too, can add it to your list!

Nanette Mathe is an Alive Hospice chaplain who serves on the agency’s Murfreesboro team.