Sarah Neeley

I am blessed that I spent many years being a hospice home-care nurse. I desperately wanted my patients to be free from pain and symptoms. I wanted the family to feel supported and nurtured. The interdisciplinary team with whom I worked had the same priorities.

Because death happens to each and every one of us, my husband became a hospice patient. Being on the other side of my life’s work was surreal. Having such experience as a hospice nurse was suddenly useless. After the admissions nurse left, I was aware there is no protocol as to what to do next. I felt like there should be some service to mark such an event. My husband suggested I cook dinner.

As his nurse began visiting and medications were changed and adjusted, I realized the relief I experienced because I no longer was the point person for his care. The social worker helped my husband prepare his goodbyes. He looked forward to the Monday morning chaplain visits, and apparently, they talked about everything.

The support I felt as a caregiver was enormous. The fatigue I felt was equally as big. I never understood what my families endured. Being up at night, receiving the many people that visited my larger than life husband and just trying to keep life moving was often more than I could do.

My best friend and I had our friend, the funeral director, meet at my office to plan the services.

Minutes after my husband died, our house was full of people that loved me and my darling husband. Folks were coming in from all over. I knew that we were loved. I knew that I was blessed.

I never knew the lessons one can learn in such a horrific time. I am learning forgiveness. I am allowing people to help me. I am able to say that I am having a bad day. I am becoming more transparent. Grief is hard work. Change is difficult. I know that every experience can allow me spiritual growth even if I am not growing graciously.

Sarah Neeley has been part of the Alive Hospice Team for 26 years. She joined the agency as a home-care nurse in 1983 and today serves as clinical nurse educator.

Becky Riney

In honor of National Social Work Month, I invited my fellow social workers at Alive Hospice to share why love their jobs. Here are some of their thoughts:

“We don’t get to choose the things that happen in our lives, but we can learn to cope with the storms that come our way. I love being able to step into the darkness of the storm with people and become a part of their healing and hope. It is an honor and privilege to have people trust you with their hearts.” –Nicole Hilliard, Grief Counselor

“I love those magical, intimate moments that you can’t always explain or get your head around.  This could be finding a donation or resource that came through at the last minute for someone who needs assistance, or calling a family member or patient on the phone and hearing they were just thinking about me and needing to talk at that very moment….” –Alyson Garvey, Alive Hospice home care social worker

“Each day I meet new challenges with grace and no day is the same. I try to assist patients and families at such a critical time by providing comfort and words of encouragement. Sometimes things seem so difficult, and you often wonder how things will come together. My motto has become, ‘Somehow…. some way… things will work out.’ Thanks for the opportunity to serve.”  –Shirlene Campbell, social worker at Alive Hospice at Skyline Madison Campus

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Becky Riney

As a social worker at Alive Hospice Residence Nashville, I work with patients and families at a crucial time in their lives. As people imagine what it’s like to work at hospice, they picture constant sadness. With tender hearts, people often ask, “How can you do that kind of work? I could never do that.”

I’ve had many patients’ family members tell me about what a wonderful  experience they’ve had at the Residence. I hear about the caring staff, the peaceful atmosphere, and quality time spent with loved ones. It is satisfying to be able to provide a caring presence, an ear to listen, and education about what to expect and our grief support services. I am able to give practical assistance with things including advance directives and options on burial arrangements. It is very fulfilling to work with a caring staff in a place of peace where sometimes wonderful and healing things happen.

I have been privileged to see healing of relationships. I have seen people face great loss with honest tears and courageous humor. I have seen nurses provide comfort to people physically and emotionally. I have seen hospice aides (certified nurse technicians) treat people with dignity and serve without complaint. I have seen medical staff communicate with honesty and compassion. I have seen chaplains provide comforting words and prayers and rituals. I have seen volunteers share a pet or provide beautiful music to add joy to a life that is nearing its end on this earth. I have seen patients experience peaceful deaths.

I have provided tours to families when a loved one is admitted who say they wish they had come sooner. It is a privilege and honor to do such work.

Becky Riney is a social worker at Alive Hospice Residence Nashville.