Nanette Mathe

I recently conducted a survey among my patients asking them what they are most thankful for. The number one answer was “loved ones”. They are thankful for the loved ones who are taking care of them, the loved ones from the past who helped shape their lives, and loved ones whose lives they have helped shape. It was nearly unanimous!

The second thing they are most thankful for was an experience of some kind. For example, some said they got to see the art of a favorite artist, or hear a concert of a favorite composer or musician. Others talked about having the opportunity to travel to see something magnificent like the Grand Canyon, or Paris, or the animals in Africa.

For those who believe in God, they are thankful for the years they have had while wishing for just a little more time. But still, they are thankful.

Funny, they weren’t thankful for the extra hours they put in at their jobs, or, for that matter, for money earned, money spent, or even money given away. Hmmmm… what does that teach us?

With this wonderful Thanksgiving holiday upon us, what are you thankful for? What is out there that you have a passion for and would like to experience? Do it soon so you, too, can add it to your list!

Nanette Mathe is an Alive Hospice chaplain who serves on the agency’s Murfreesboro team.

Janny Adkins

As we approach this season of traditional thanks-giving, my mind turns naturally to the act of expressing gratitude. The act of looking for something for which to be grateful is a valuable life skill that can hold all of us in good stead.

Most of my life lessons have been learned from my hospice experiences. Learning to be grateful for the simple pleasures is one life skill that is invaluable. It is attention to and cultivating an awareness of those experiences that create a feeling of connection which form the foundation for gratitude.

I have heard it said that enlightened people express gratitude for the things others simply take for granted. When you experience and express gratitude, your quality of life will be enhanced. Consider for a moment all those people, places, and things for which you are grateful. Connect with that feeling and express your gratitude. It is healing.

Janny Adkins is an Alive Hospice account executive who informs health care professionals, patients, and families about hospice care.

Teresa Yarbrough

One of my favorite things about the autumn season is the incredible variety of colors in the plant life I am surrounded by this time of year. The brilliant reds and burgundies, the shockingly vibrant shades of gold and orange capture my attention completely, regardless of whatever important or mundane thought had been my focus only seconds earlier.

Several years ago, during the fall, I had a genuine “hospice experience” while hiking through the colorful woods at Radnor Lake and it has become a recurrent annual practice since that time. On that first occasion, I had been walking deep in the forest on a particularly windy day and bright yellow leaves were literally cascading through the air from trees on the way to their final resting place on the ground. I remember being so taken aback by the beauty of the dancing, fluttering, twirling leaves that I simply had to sit on a nearby bench and take in the sight as fully as I could.

As I lay on my back on the bench, all I could see was an azure blue sky filled with spinning and reeling golden leaves. And yet each leaf seemed to have its own peculiar rhythm, its own particular pirouette, its own trajectory. That’s when it happened: my hospice moment. I began to consider the many lives I had been privileged to care for during their final descent from their own “tree of life” toward their own individual place of rest.

Suddenly, I was flooded with countless images paralleling the symbolism of a kaleidoscope of autumn leaves blowing in the wind, or free-falling with simple gravity – to lives lived colorfully, uniquely, in each and every aspect. The endless number of shapes and shades of leaves likened to the infinite number of experiences and adventures or personalities any particular person’s life has been characterized by. Observing the walking trail literally carpeted with fallen leaves brought to mind the elaborate way those lives continue to affect and inform family and friends still ambling along the path.

At times the extra cushion of a thick layer of leaves may soften the trekking or perhaps, on occasion, obscure the direction of the footpath momentarily. But always, in the end, the autumn leaves eventually nourish the earth and therein nurture each of us — just as the legacies of our loved ones have done for us.

It seems that my long walks in the autumn woods each year continue to bring to my memory the multi-layered and many-faceted metaphors that captivated my thoughts on that day years ago — in my original hospice moment.

Teresa Yarbrough is a registered nurse at Alive Hospice Residence Nashville.

Alive Hospice continued its celebration of National Hospice Month this week with help from Murfreesboro Mayor Tommy Bragg. Mayor Bragg met with Alive Hospice representatives at Murfreesboro City Hall to sign a proclamation in honor of hospice caregivers.

“We certainly appreciate the good works Alive Hospice does in our community day in and day out,” Mayor Bragg said. “This proclamation is one way for us to show that appreciation.”

The proclamation recognized hospice caregivers “for their dedication to the ideals that make their services such a valued part of our community.” Additionally, the mayor called upon the City of Murfreesboro “to join us in so honoring the organization’s anniversary month.” (Alive Hospice was founded in November 1975, the year after the nation’s first hospice program was established in Connecticut.)

Alive Hospice’s Murfreesboro office, located on Medical Center Parkway, serves as the home base for a team of caregivers that provide hospice care to patients and their families in five counties (Rutherford, Bedford, Cannon, Coffee and DeKalb). Additionally, the agency’s Murfreesboro office has a full-time grief counselor who offers individual counseling for adults and children as well as grief support groups throughout the year.

Pictured: Faye Northcutt-Knox, Alive Hospice’s Murfreesboro marketing representative; Alive Hospice Board Member and Murfreesboro resident Faye Johnson; Murfreesboro Mayor Tommy Bragg; Pam Barnes, clinical director of the agency’s Murfreesboro team; and Alive Hospice President and CEO Jan Jones.

Sarah Neeley

I did not mean to say it. I never even thought of myself as such. Widows are little old ladies. Widows are…ME!

I was giving a talk to new employees on families and culture not long ago. I try to make discussions personal so people can relate. I was talking about family roles and I said that in my family of origin I was the… (insert family role here). I said, “In my family I am the mother, daughter, widow, and sister.”

Stop. Did I just admit to that?

I do not believe in labels or stereotypes but I do believe we need to acknowledge the truth. I am a widow.

Speaking the truth is a good idea.

Sarah Neeley is Alive Hospice’s clinical nurse educator.

Jan Jones

November is National Hospice Month and there couldn’t be a better time than now to celebrate the work of so many dedicated individuals involved in the hospice movement and providing hospice care. 

We are in the midst of attempting to figure out how best to finance health care in this country at a time when our economy is incredibly challenged. We know that hospice care could be a bright light in this debate because it is the right kind of care for people at the end of their lives and it is delivered efficiently and compassionately without waste of resources. Yet little is being said about shoring up the delivery of this important service. 

Just a few short years ago hospice care was little more than “budget dust” on the books of Medicare expenditures. Because of the care we provide and the incredible outreach that has occurred over the past decade, hospice care no longer fits into that category. So, as Dr. Tribble stated, our head pops up in the Whack-A-Mole game being played in Congress. There are no easy answers to this debate over how to “fix” health care in the U.S., but I know for certain that hospice care is a solution, not a problem. 

During Hospice Month, which is being celebrated throughout the nation, there is not a better time to make this fact known to our legislators. Won’t you join us in making this known?

Speaking of the right kind of care at the right time, we recently were graced with a visit from Melissa Gilbert of Little House on the Prairie fame, who is passionate about the delivery of hospice and palliative care to children. During her visit she had the opportunity to visit with two of the families for whom Alive Hospice has provided care. She was thrilled to see how these families have been helped by the support of hospice and palliative care and continues to wonder why this care is so inadequately financed. 

Melissa Gilbert (left), who starred in ‘Little House on the Prairie’    as Laura Ingalls, is pictured holding 8-month-old Alive Hospice    patient Jordyn Luker. Jordyn’s mother, Tiffaney, is seated next    to them.

There are many barriers to delivering hospice and palliative care to children including that of financing of that care. We are grateful for community support which allows us to provide such care (including a recent grant from The Memorial Foundation). But Congress needs to do more to remove barriers and allow this much needed care to be financed appropriately.

It is critical to care for those most vulnerable in our population who may be unable to speak for themselves. Melissa is a spokesperson in this regard and never misses an opportunity to advocate for this much-needed care. We were blessed to share a few bright moments with her. She exudes a warmth and love that the children respond to beautifully. What a gift to observe this firsthand.

Jan Jones is president and CEO of Alive Hospice.

Metro Nashville Mayor Karl Dean helped Alive Hospice celebrate National Hospice Month with a mayoral proclamation this month. Alive Hospice representatives gathered for the proclamation signing ceremony at the Davidson County Courthouse. Those in attendance included Alive Hospice leaders; clinical staff representing the agency’s home care, inpatient, and pediatric care teams, a grief counselor, community outreach staff, and a volunteer.

The proclamation read in part: “During National Hospice Month, the City of Nashville honors the dedicated health care professionals that provide comfort to patients facing life-threatening illnesses and a limited life-expectancy.”

“There’s no doubt of the importance of hospice care nationally and here in the city of Nashville,” Mayor Dean said. “Hospice caregivers are people who have made it their purpose to provide comfort for others at one of the most difficult times there is. They celebrate life, and today, we celebrate them.”

Ruth Williams

The holidays are coming. Evidence is mounting!

Red and green are beginning to infiltrate the stores. Many of us resist the sudden onslaught of turkeys and wreaths due to what many believe is an over-commercialization of the holiday season. But for many others, the upcoming holidays are resisted because a beloved member of their family will not be at their spot at the dinner table or occupying the favorite easy chair in the corner.

One of the reasons folks dread the holidays is that we traditionally see holidays (particularly the ones in November and December: Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa…) as a time for family to gather and share joyful experiences with one another. When one of the usual faces is absent, it can change the whole experience into one of sadness and loss.

Alive Grief Support Services recognizes that the holidays are an exceptionally challenging time for most grieving individuals. Consequently, we have three evening seminars scheduled around the theme of “Grief During the Holidays” – two in Nashville on November 19 and December 3 and one in Murfreesboro on December 1. (Call 963-4732 to register for the Nashville seminars and 907-1677 to register for the Murfreesboro seminar.)

If you need a little help getting through the next few weeks, please join us. John Baker, a grief counselor, will share some helpful information, followed by a very lovely and meaningful ritual for those who choose to participate. John and our other grief counselors are available for individual counseling as well for anyone who has experienced a loss, regardless of whether they had a connection to an Alive Hospice patient or not.

We all need one another all throughout the year. Holidays are no different. In fact, often they’re extra hard. It’s okay to ask for help.

Ruth Williams is a counselor with Alive Grief Support Services, the bereavement support program of Alive Hospice.